This morning, I was thinking about my situation. Then I remembered a play I read in college by Sartre. It's called Huis Clos or No Exit in English. The play, in it's simplest form, is about a group of people stuck in a room. Through conversation they find out each other's darkest secret and basically get on each other's nerves in the worst way. It turns out that they are in Hell. That most people think of their idea of Hell being fire and brimstone and a red guy with horns. But in all actuality it is a norm/typical situation that one may find him/herself in. The only difference is that in the play, you can't leave. So it's about how we each create our own personal Hell and it's a tailored fit for your own personal needs.
I have decided that this...is my own personal hell. The difference is that I know I can get out of it. I would like to look for a job now as I am on the computer all day, but I am sure people here would frown upon that. :) It'll get better. I just need to be proactive again vs. wallowing in my self-pity.
Funny moment from last night. I'm sitting on a couch talking to V and thecat and I mentioned that my butt was no longer numb. Thecat shoots a look at V and I said, "he had absolutely nothing to do with my butt being numb!"
Good part of today: loud people do not come in till 12. woohoo!! Wednesday and Thursdays are good days at work. :)
Bad part: I passed Niki on the expressway. She was in a minor accident. Her and her car are fine, but she was late for work. I was driving by saying hey that looks like...Fuck that is Niki. But I called her and all is well with the world.